Time for an escape!
I’ve decided that a little trip away from the day-to-day drudgery was much-needed and so — a little impulsively, I might add — got a couple days of vacation and am headed down to the only mountains within driving distance — Smoky Mountain National Park.
While I’ve driven through the area, I’ve never actually been to the park, so I’m looking forward to this little adventure. What I’m NOT looking forward to is the hours of driving I’ll have to do to get there. Yes, yes… much easier to put a driving trip into action than having to figure out flights. Especially if I want to be able to afford food and lodging at the other end of it. But still. Lots of hours.
But – my Zune is packed with tunes (and a few books to listen to!), the snacks have been purchased and I’m anxious to hit the road and get the party started! The only downside? It’s a party of one.
The fact of life is that while my friends are my top priority — I’m the go-to-gal when it comes to… well… anything they might need — I’m practically not even in their list of priorities, much less the top priority. I spent 20 years with my head up my ass, frantically trying to pull off the straight life thing, and what it’s resulted in is a bunch of great friends who have husbands and kids and schedules and commitments to everything other than me.
Which sucks sometimes. And it doesn’t usually bother me, but it’s hitting me kind of hard right now, for reasons unknown. One of these days I want to have someone where I’m the one they think of first. Yes – I want to be someone’s priority. Too much to ask?
In the meantime, I’m going to try my darnedest to not let the fact that my friends lack the flexibility to be spontaneous with me and just go out and conquer the world on my own. There’s satisfaction in doing it that way, albeit tinged with a bit of loneliness at the edges. And if I keep myself open to possibilities, who knows what just might happen! After all, you never know who you might meet at the hotel lodge bar over drinks….